Balanced Being, The Art of Emotional Regulation

Emotions,

Our feelings are the vibrant hues that colour our daily experiences—sometimes softly illuminating our world, other times flooding it with intensity. In this fast-paced life, with its constant demands, unexpected turns, and increased screen time, learning to regulate and balance emotions is not only a vital survival skill but also a pathway to thriving rather than merely surviving. Living with stress and anxiety seems to be widespread right now. This newsletter is written to help you understand and explore the art and science of emotional regulation, providing insights, strategies, and encouragement. Supporting your journey toward inner harmony and balance.  We all have a choice in how we respond to life. Are there areas in your life that you would like to improve in terms of emotional regulation and grounded being?

The Science Behind Emotional Balance

Our brain and nervous system are wired to react quickly to perceived threats—an ancient survival mechanism. However, most encounters we face today do not require a fight-or-flight reaction, and our nervous system doesn't often distinguish the difference. Emotional balance is about noticing nervous system signals and cultivating embodied awareness. Steven Porges explains the nervous system responses well with the Polyvagal Theory. https://youtu.be/CWVgXQKrqQ4?si=rimZr1H374vV1vJK

Neuroscientific research indicates that practices such as mindfulness/ increasing awareness, cognitive reframing, time in nature and regular self-reflection enhance and transform the neural pathways involved in emotional regulation. Providing a solid feeling of presence. By practicing and embodying calm, we cultivate a more flexible and adaptive response to life's inevitable ups and downs, thereby regaining balance and emotional regulation with ease.

Inner Development of Emotional Regulation

Emotional regulation refers to our ability first to notice, then determine how to respond to emotional experiences. When we ignore or suppress our emotions, our nervous system remains on autopilot, and deregulation and uncertainty persist; often, we don't even know why.

Instead, do your best to pay attention to your feelings with a neutral, compassionate attitude. Noticing feelings/emotions allows you to make conscious choices about how to respond. For example, if you are feeling sad, embrace sadness, don't push it away. Ask the emotion to be with you, as you would a little one who needs comfort. "Come here, sadness, sit with me, how can I help?" Or if you are feeling fight or flight, ask yourself "Am I safe right now?" and respond accordingly.

Recognizing and engaging in self-reflection, along with observing bodily sensations, leads to emotional regulation and embodied integration. This straightforward practice of awareness and self-compassion is crucial for developing emotional intelligence, promoting a stable sense of self, and enhancing overall well-being and health. Support is beneficial when beginning this practice and cultivating the habit of self-care and emotional regulation. Having someone else act as a stable mirror to provide feedback enhances personal awareness.

Why Emotional Regulation Matters 

It helps reduce stress: When we can assess and navigate our emotions skillfully, stressful situations become more manageable, and we recover from setbacks more quickly.

It is physically more beneficial. The body is not in a fight-or-flight response; a calm nervous system improves overall health. Living from a place of ease helps the body function in its natural state of harmony.

Improving emotional regulation enhances your relationships with both yourself and others. It fosters empathy, patience, and a deeper understanding, while also boosting the capacity for honest communication, all of which are crucial for sustaining healthy and authentic relationships.

Emotional regulation contributes to emotional balance, which in turn fosters self-confidence, life satisfaction, inner knowing, and resilience—all of which provide a positive outlook and a more profound sense of grounding to navigate life's stresses.

We have the right to Be, Belong, and Become. Having the process or regulation mirrored back to you is essential because we often don't even notice it. After all, deregulation has become normal, and it's not!

That's where I come in. Reach out if this calls to you.